How not to run a small press

If you're a publisher, this is an example of how not to do business. The following is a real exchange I had recently with the representative of a small press. The name of the company and the author have been changed to avoid embarrassing them.

Email received on 12/20/07:

Dear David:

I was glad to find your site!

As a small press, we'd really appreciate a review or interview of Author X's upcoming novel XYZ. The novel is not available until mid to late January but information on it is posted on our site at [website] under novels.

[Plot summary omitted.]

Please, let me know if you'd consider interviewing Author X or reviewing her book.

I replied on 12/20/07:

I can try to take a look.

Ordinarily in situations like this I decline...But I suppose I was feeling generous due to the Christmas spirit.

Well, I never heard anything. (And, of course, immediately forgot all about it.) Until this email arrived on 3/29/08:

I'd love to send you a copy, however, if I don't know for sure there's going to be a review (either good or bad), I don't send them out. We're a small press.  Can you let me know if you are for sure interested in reviewing it and posting it?

Let's set aside for the moment the fact that it took them 3 months to reply -- by which time the book had zero chance of getting reviewed anyway. (I'm currently reading May books for possible review -- not January books.) The notion that a reviewer is going to promise to review a book before they've even seen it is so ludicrous that it boggles the mind.

So I replied:

Chances are, at best, 1 in 20 for a review. It's the same with all the books I receive.

I can understand where you're coming from, but no legitimate critic can guarantee a review. The business just doesn't work that way.

Sorry.

The publisher replied back:

Thanks anyway.

This exchange just goes to show that anyone can call themselves a publisher these days without actually learning how the business works. As I said in my reply above, no legitimate book reviewer is going to guarantee a publisher a review. It doesn't work like that. Publishers send the books and take their chances. It doesn't matter if you're Random House or Dave's Fly-by-Night Press -- the rules are the same.

The sad part is, people are entrusting this company with the fate of their books -- and clearly they have very little idea what they're doing.

Comments

[Guyot]

I actually have a book coming out with Dave's Fly-By-Night Press. Though, people in-the-know simply call it DFBNP.

My book, INTENTIONAL HOP, will hit the stands on June 31st. Well, not really stands like in B&N. DFBNP wants to target the right audience and - since the book is about a one-legged minor league catcher who overcomes his addiction to midget pornography to rise up the ranks of the Hickory Crawdads organization and have his moment in the sun, except it's raining - DFBNP wants to try and sell the books at minor league ballparks around the country, hence the legal use of "hitting the stands on June 31st."

I've been happy with DFBNP for the most part, though having to physically pick up the copies of IHOP (that's what DFNBP calls the book) at Kinko's is taking its toll on my 1979 Mazda RX7.

If you'd like to review IHOP - there is a mystery element to it when one of Truell Hackensack's (he's the one-legged protagonist) relief pitchers loses his paisley mitt - I can ask them to send you one.

Or maybe I can drop one by. Is there a Kinko's near you?

[David Montgomery]

That book sounds better than the one in the original pitch.

[Doug Riddle]

Guyot,

I think your main character was my waitress the last time I ate at IHop.

[Doug Riddle]

oh, and congrats on the new car.

[Clea Simon]

hey, I'd review ihop. On my blog. Don't you want to buy an ad?

(sorry, I get these too)

[Elaine Flinn]

Oh, IHOP sounds terrific! Tell you what, you send me an IHOP gift card good for one year, and I'll feature you on 'Spotlight' over at Evil E tomorrow. But time is of the essence-the column is done-but I could make a few changes. AND if you make that gift card for TWO years, I'll add your book title to my saga.

But hurry - this offer is only good for two hours.

[Elaine Flinn]

Well, Guyot - time is running out. You've got 40 minutes to take up this unprecedented offer.

[Sara]

LOL, Guyot.